rm -Rf "bits of the past"

So most of my post are about how i am moving ahead, how while i enjoy the nostalgia of the past, the technology and the tactile memory, the fun, the discovery, the pains of being a nerd kid in the 2000s in copiapo and specially and what is this is about, an archivist

i have 357 uploads on archive.org not a big number, but i think it's a decent one.

so why i am here deleting some bits of my past? idk to be honest

for the last couple of months, since i got the iphone i had to take the task of move all my photos and stuff to that phone, from android, they don't make it hard, but also not easy, exporting from accounts, importing back, the typical pains of moving platforms.

the move had an interesting side effect, it brought back most of the photos i had deleted from the samsung phone i had before, stuff from my past relationship, photos, videos and stuff i though it was deleted forever

that shows two things, the cloud fuckers don't really delete stuff and two, the past can hit you like a train when you least expect it.

so yeah, when i got hit with more than 60k photos i had painfully deleted mostly one by one, because yeah, i have to check im not deleting anything i actually care about.

iphone gallery, 60k photos back

fuck.

do i go and delete them again or do i let the past stay, now on icloud and on the silicon memory inside the iphone, what do i  do? do i let the past stay, as a memory, as something that happened?

nah fuck it

and you know why? first of all, some private photos had to go, thats just basic respect, and second, i felt like it's archival in their own sense, im archiving the past, shoving it on a hard disk and trashing it, symbolically i guess, but im doing that.

so i did, i deleted all the photos again, let the face recognition work, deleted all it found again, repeat until it was gone.

and it's not because i need to delete the past or something, because i hate it or hate him, or just because the past is that, the past

it's just because that chapter is closed, i lived it, the memories, the learning, the whole universe that existed there is alive in the mind, but i don't need the refreshers when the phone goes "hey here remember this photo from december 2019?"

years years ago i deleted my first youtube channel, that i made like in 2006 or so, all the videos i made, the interactions, everything gone, i was rebooting my life at some point, and it was fine

i kinda miss that, can't revisit it because i didn't kept backups or something, but you know, it's still fine, i kinda remember what i did back then and that's enough

some years ago i dropped a hard disk with all the stuff i had from that era too, 3TB of data gone, lost to a clicking hdd, i still hold the disk, in my "stuff that is very important" box but if i never recover it, it's fine, i suffered that lost already, i cried the data, i though of paying the insane prices they ask for recovery, and i guess even if i can't get rid of the physical disk yet, i think i'm in peace with the data loss.

so yeah, deleted the selected photos i had from my past, and it's fine, it's not hate, it's not anger, its just moving on, the memories are where they matter, in my brain and only there now, and that's all right.

kiwa out.